My Grandma

My grandma lives in a nursing home and I do not see her often. But when I am up North I spend time visiting with her. Most days she did not recognize me.

She is caught in her own mind, a bit nervous and quite feisty. She does not seem to want to make friends or engage in conversations.

My mom visits her every week and she told me there are good days and bad ones.

But after not having seen her in a year I can tell she is less alert and not as much with us.

I look at her hands, just skin and bones at this point. Quite wrinkly skin and so white, as she never spends anytime outside, she feels cold and does not like to go outside. She needs both hands to hold things, as her grip is failing her. And yet to me they are beautiful.

It is so strange, but I see this frail person and feel so much love in my heart.

My grandma has to be coerced into drinking water or really anything. When she does her mind returns to a degree and she remembers, but most afternoons she is lost in a past that we do not understand.

But one morning I had to wake her up when we got there and she looked at me and she said "Jessica, it was your birthday, happy birthday" as if she had dreamt about me. It brought tears to my eyes.

She did like the visits from Rags and Mia and below are a few pictures of us.